What to wear to a funeral

by ANTOINETTE STONHAM

Funerals? I’ll bet you’re wondering what has prompted me to write this blog!

Well, it’s a couple of different things.

I have recently lost my Mum and then a young women who was very close to me and my family. Two very different funerals in a short period of time. Then as I was writing this we heard of the passing of Queen Elizabeth II.

So what to wear to a funeral? The attire depends on a number of things  - some funerals are all about tradition, some follow requests from the deceased or their family, other funerals are left up to the person attending.

Funerals black on black

In most cases it’s preferable to wear classic clothing, to show respect. It is preferable to cover the shoulders and usually wear something that is not too short or tight or that draws attention to you. Consider a simple dress with a jacket or cardigan, or a classic pants suit in a dark colour but do avoid bold stand out colours unless the family have requested it.

It’s all about being classy and respectful especially if it’s held in a church.

DO I HAVE TO WEAR BLACK? The answer can be yes or no depending on the situation.

In my case, I come from a Middle Eastern family it is traditionally black on black, no make, no standout jewellery. When we lost my Dad thirty years ago we all abided by the tradition. In Mum’s case it was different as Mum disliked black and didn’t have a single black garment in her wardrobe. I remember when we were younger, Mum would purchase a black dress to go to a funeral - and straight after the funeral she would donate it.

This prompted me to not go the traditional black on black. I wore a navy dress and coat, pearls, makeup, a yellow brooch which was my Mum’s favourite colour, her favourite red lipstick. My Mum never left the house without her lippy and I know she’d appreciate the effort.

On the other hand, the beautiful young women friend we lost requested everyone wear pink or purple, her favourite colours. I wore a black dress and a pink blazer, hubby wore a black suit and white shirt with a pink tie, as was requested.

Funeral - black and bright

Tradition or a request will determine what to wear to a funeral. Other than that keep it simple, classy and respectful. To be safe go for black, navy or charcoal when it come to a choice of colour.

A funeral is about showing respect for the deceased and their family, it’s not about you.